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Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.
— Oscar Wilde.

My favorite Arunachula mountain

An End to Violence

TWO STEPS TOWARD ENDING VIOLENCE

“begin with the children” by Kaiven Fenton MS

Violence in society, as we already know is extremely destructive, costing billions of dollars each year in prisons, medical care, loss of innocent life, etc. The only solution to all violence against society, as well as an individual, is to prevent the buildup of the internal rage and fury, in the first place. That has to begin with listening to and emotionally supporting all of our children. Along with the many things being done already, I strongly believe prevention is the only permanent solution. I am speaking of preventing the initial buildup of frustration and anger emotions, because when they are left alone to build up inside, they will eventually lead to violence of some kind.

I think we, as a society, are tragically unaware of the potential danger of unexpressed emotional pain in our children. That pain doesn’t just dissipate on its own. A few fortunate children have the opportunity to express theirs to emotionally healthy adults who can address it and teach them how to handle it appropriately. But where does the suppressed emotional pain of the unlucky children go? For far too many kids, that pain becomes a justifiable anger or rage and left unexpressed, escalates to rage and fury.

It is natural to want to express feelings and emotions. However, most children do not know how to release them in a healthy way, beginning at the frustration or anger level when they are very young. So they end up holding them all in, where they continually eat at them inside, until they cannot be contained anymore and they just explode furiously. At some point, those pent up emotions will be propelled with great and often uncontrollable force, either outward or inwardly. Outward expression is seen in the form of classroom disruption, bullying, animal killing, torture, rape, domestic violence, killings in schools, etc. Inward expression is seen in the form of addictions, suicide, cutting, eating disorders, depression, anxiety, etc.

Most of society is extremely uncomfortable with even acknowledging these deep “negative” emotions. It has not been able to admit that there is a dire need for a healthy expression of them, before they build to rage and explode in fury. It is easier and more acceptable to focus on weapons, drugs, illegal immigration or almost anything else, as the cause of violence in our society. This is sad for me to recognize. I am writing to hopefully shine some light on this “elephant in society’s room.” I think we can provide emotional outlets for young children the same as we do for adults, knowing it is a natural need.

Millions of children are desperate to feel heard and respected by someone they trust. They need to be able to share their ongoing painful feelings of being bullied, abused or neglected by siblings, parents or classmates, all during their growing up years. Sharing deep feelings and being heard is essential for the healthy emotional well being of children, as well as adults. If children’s feelings are shared, and heard by trained caring adults who can teach and guide them, the feelings do not have to stay inside and fester. It is important that these emotions be released early on to avoid the buildup to rage.

Adults are encouraged to share their emotions and feelings at anonymous meetings, therapy groups and many other kinds of groups. Why are we denying our children the same basic, well known need for this expression? For boys it will help reverse the current and unhealthy, “suck it up” and “stuff your feelings” messages now in place. Also the old false beliefs that I grew up under, “Children should be seen and not heard, “(as if children did not have painful feelings that needed expression,) has caused much psychological damage.

Society is slow to acknowledge that children also have feelings and have a right to express them. In the early stages, simple frustrations kept within, can build up to anger. Then left unexpressed, this inside anger, builds and piles upon itself, getting stronger and stronger, ultimately turning into rage and fury. If these strong emotions are not acknowledged and allowed release in a healthy manner, they will be released somehow eventually…and in ways society does not approve of.

Millions of Americans do not have time for themselves, let alone for all of their children’s emotional needs. The average parents are unlikely to address “hostile or negative” emotions in themselves even, so it is unlikely they will acknowledge them in their children. Parents themselves often do not know of healthy ways to express their own emotions, let alone show their children healthy expression. In addition, one or both parents are often working, usually out of economic necessity and coming home exhausted with still more household chores to do. With several children in a family, inner life is forced to take a back seat in the whirlwind of family life. Therefore we, as a society, ought not to continue to depend on, or expect parents to tend to the angry and frustrating emotions of their little ones, in a patient, kind and loving manner.

The late Marshall Rosenberg devoted many years to traveling around the world and in corporate America, teaching adults how to listen empathically because, to be heard is a basic human need. Alice Miller, a famous psychologist said that even a badly abused child can turn out to be a happy, productive citizen if they have that one person in their life who can listen to them, allowing them to feel heard and respected. You have probably heard of instances where that one special person in a child’s life (a teacher, big brother or sister, mentor or counselor) made a big difference in their life. If you ask the child what caused them to change for the better, they will tell you they felt listened to and that made all the difference.

In our ever increasing stressful society, every child deserves the right to educational and healthy emotional development. They both need our focus. We have a powerful opportunity, to relieve our children of the extreme stress of carrying their emotional burdens alone. As I stated earlier, in this fast paced often perceived hectic society, we can no longer rely on one or two parents alone to relieve their children’s painful emotional burdens. They need our help because of the tremendous responsibilities they have. It takes a village to raise emotionally healthy children and we don’t live in tribal villages anymore, with help from the elders and friends. In addition, extended families, that used to live nearby, have mostly disappeared.

We as a society, can choose to either respect a child’s right to be heard or we can continue as we are, not listening and suffering the results. We can allow them to verbally share their personal anguish now, or we can experience physical violence from them later on, it is our societal choice. I believe it is a worthwhile goal to give all of our children the skills for healthy emotional development along with their educational development. It takes a special adult that can allow a child to feel heard. What better place for this to happen, then in our public schools and daycare centers where children gather every day, year after year?

I feel certain that, if we have the will, we can provide well trained volunteer “mentors and listeners” for every toddler and child, in every day care center, pre-school and grade school across America. Trained volunteers do not have to fix a child’s problems or even stop abuse in their life, they can refer them to other programs specifically designed to address each child and their parent’s unique situation. Volunteer listener trainees can be almost any willing person, from college and high school students to older and retired people, after receiving special training and a thorough background check. If our “future adults” are respected, heard and loved as children, they can begin to break the violence cycle, for themselves as well as their own potential children, for generations perhaps. A more nurturing, respecting and peaceful society can then flourish.

The first step I believe, is to (1) convince society that toddlers, as well as young children, are desperate for, and deserve an opportunity to be lovingly and respectfully heard. (2) implement a plan that will require every grade school and day care center across the United States to provide well trained volunteer listeners and mentors from the community; people that can maintain trusting relationships from pre-school, through grade school, as much as possible. With continued opportunities for emotional respect and support, there would be much less internal fertile ground for rage and fury to develop. Of most significance to a child is to be patiently heard. That alone could, in some cases, prevent the frequent and dangerous daily buildup of painful emotions.

Along with listener mentors, we also need to redesign our schools by “marrying” the educators with the social workers and psychologists, together under one roof, if possible. The current school counselors can then be mostly responsible for training and managing the listener mentors. Providing space close to, or within schools, will allow social workers and psychologists to focus full time on the overall prevention of violence. Working in this preventative manner could prove much less stressful for them. It could replace their being overburdened with maximum caseloads of families and yanking children out of homes and away from parents who simply did not know how to listen to them. That way the emotional needs of students are being tended to by most the qualified professionals, leaving teachers free to do what they do best…. teach.

Will we continue as we are, blaming everything else for the daily societal violence we witness? Or are we ready enough yet, to recognize the source of violence and slowly and deliberately become the “supportive village” needed for a happy and peaceful future society? All that is really needed is a belief that children can grow up feeling respected, loved and heard, with caring and supportive help from their community. As they become adults they will already BE the happy and peaceful future society, we all want. If we leave that huge job to one or two parents, we will continue to see violent rage and fury expressed everywhere. Our only two challenges are, to rearrange our country’s priorities and begin to put a simple listening solution into practice.

Eventually the unprecedented amount of federal, state and local monies that are now being spent for a criminal justice system that simply doesn’t work, can be redirected towards covering the cost of an education system that also includes much needed emotional development. We all want a happy, peaceful world, but we cannot have that until or unless we have happy, peaceful kids. After all our society consists of grown up kids.

kaivenfenton@gmail.com for comments

Human evolution

Gender Neutral Human Beings

by Kaiven Fenton M.S.

Being and expressing who you naturally are, ought to be a right. For the majority of people it is, but a there is a minority that do not have that freedom. The reason for that is six words, among them, “man,” “masculine” and “woman,” “feminine.” I believe these words or labels were erroneously defined initially by connecting them to a particular human gender/sex. Those labels indicate specific traits, abilities, characteristics, talents, gifts and attributes that either males or females should have, possess, or express, according to long established cultural and societal norms and beliefs. Females who express themselves in a “masculine” manner or conversely males who express themselves in a “feminine” manner are and always have been, at risk of ridicule, abuse and often death.

Most humans are born with either male or female genitalia, and world wide, 2% of humans are born with both. Gender on the other hand, according to my dictionary, is “Either of the two sexes, especially when considered with reference to social and cultural differences rather than biological ones.” Regardless of our genitalia, (physical sex “assigned at birth,”) those social and cultural differences include our natural characteristics, traits, talents, skills, attributes and abilities we are born with and that I call natural.

Things like being brave or cowardly, emotionally strong or weak and attitudes and life outlooks which are either learned or developed growing up, have nothing to do with what our genitalia is, nor do internal or external characteristics, traits, talents, skills, attributes or abilities. They have everything to do with the beliefs of society and our culture who has believed for centuries that they definitely do belong exclusively to one gender or the other. Therein lies the greatest error of all time, still causing the greatest harm to many millions of innocent people.

We continue to call plants and animals male and female. But humans became labeled and connected to the characteristics, traits, talents, skills etc. strongly assumed to belong to their body gender.. Female became associated with “woman,” “girl” and “feminine” and male became associated with “boy,” “man” and “masculine.” “Man” originally referred to both sexes. Then the label for a female human was created which was wif at first, then became wo man. Over time, these traits, characteristics and roles, initially undisputed, were carried on throughout the centuries as if they were true and reliable. Ask yourself why you must know the gender of a person before beginning a conversation with them. Why do you think it is so significant to know?

It all began eons ago when a few men, the originators of the labels and their definitions, erroneously attached them to the characteristics, traits, qualities, attributes, talents, skills and roles that they probably noticed in other people. Perhaps many males and females fit the labels as they defined them then, or the men believed that if they didn’t fit them, they should. For instance females should be meek, submissive and serve males and males should be strong, courageous and protect females. Husbands could legally beat their wives as long as the rod they beat them with, was no larger than his thumb. It stated so in the Bible which was their legal reference point at the time.

Nevertheless, societal roles and laws were developed and enforced by the males of that time, (females didn’t enforce laws) and have continued to the present time. It was males who originated at least six erroneous labels, “masculine, feminine, man, woman, boy and girl.” It was not of much concern to these males if all females and all males did not meet their restrictive and sexist labels. They made laws that forced people into their distorted view of what males and females should or ought to be. Because we follow them to this day, maybe not as strictly, but many are still abused, beaten and tortured because of the absolute falseness of the labels themselves.

These labels easily became material or fodder for harassment, cruel treatment and death, sometimes legally, by and from society in general. People who thoroughly believe in those mis-defined labels, usually feel quite justified in their abusive behavior towards innocent people still, even though there is much evidence now of the labels being erroneous. If, on the other hand those words or labels had been neutral, not wrongly ascribed to a particular sex or gender (untied to gender,) those cultural meanings would not have been harmful.

As time passed, more and more males have not met the “masculine” definitions or roles of a “man.” In the latter part of the 20th century this has caused many males to ask the question openly, “What is a man?” Groups of males formed “men’s” groups and went off into the woods to discuss that question in depth.

Now, many individuals have begun to realize that the terms or labels “masculine,” “feminine,” “man,” “woman,” “boy” and “girl” do not correctly defined all people, only a majority, maybe. As a result of course, any child or adult, whose natural inborn attributes do not conform to, or match the cultural norms of the day, has had to hide them internally whenever possible. That is not only stressful, but many, males especially, have not been able to hide them, so are wrongly assumed to be “acting feminine” or are wrongly assumed to be transgender, gay, or worse, a defective human being. Many are still relentlessly harassed, tortured, commit suicide or are killed. Any school that has asked kids in a pole, why they don’t go to school will prove this point. Often a young male will commit suicide because of no emotional support available, or a place to go to for help with the emotional torture often dished out daily.

Women and girls suffer mostly emotional abuse and disrespect from men, but keep it inside. Of course many in each gender grow up believing they are flawed and defective as human beings or basically the scum of the earth, unless they have a mentor or someone telling them otherwise. In the Native American culture these mislabeled mostly males, mean just the opposite. They were called “two spirited” and were respected, revered and sought after for their knowledge and wisdom. They were sought for having both aspects of the male and female nature which was highly regarded.

With the population growing in leaps and bounds there are, of course, many more males and females whose natural talents, characteristics, gifts, skills and abilities do not meet the strict sexist cultural norms of the past that still exist today. If these 21st century societal norms could speak, they’d ask, what now? Do we just fade away, or become more strict and more punishing? Well of course we know it won’t be the latter. The growing numbers of former “misfits” and potential misfits are coming out of their respective closets and demanding respect for their natural and inborn attributes. They are beginning to feel like they now have a right to be and express their natural selves, without the constant threat of harassment, abuse or death.

Many young people are beginning to recognize the erroneousness of the labels. If they have support they are disregarding the labels and being who they are, regardless of what the labels imply. That is a start, Some people are still subject to ridicule, abuse and suicide when they attempt to ignore the labels and be who they naturally are. They still do not have the right socially because of the erroneous labels. Thousands, maybe millions still suffer at the hands of those who want to honor the old, but getting stale, cultural norms of “men” equals “masculine” for males no matter what, and “woman” equals “feminine” for females no matter what. (male=man=masculine and female=woman=feminine)

The abuse stems from beliefs of religious teachings from eons ago. Those “religious” people want to continue honoring what “God said” about subscribing to the ancient cultural norms. Also children growing up being taught to hate are also the abusers. They have beliefs that males and females are deliberately non-conforming, or are deliberately rebelling against the cultural norms for their gender. However, they are totally unaware of the real facts, which is that personal abilities, traits, characteristics, attributes, etc., are inborn and natural for every human being on the planet, regardless of their genitals.

This has been my experience as one of the “misfits” for over sixty years of adult life already. My talents, abilities, gifts, characteristics, gifts and skills are and have been, identical to many males, yet I am a female. I have experienced many condescending and cruel remarks from men and others, for my natural characteristics, traits, etc. I have also been called un-“womanly” in a condescending manner for expressing or being my natural self, which is culturally considered more “manly” than “womanly.”

I believe society as a whole, ought to allow all people to be and express who they naturally are, whether it matches their birth sex or not. As a solution, we can leave “masculine and “feminine” labels totally alone. Eliminate them all together and invent totally neutral non-gendered labels, like “apple and orange” to describe a person’s characteristics, talents, traits, attributes, gifts and abilities, instead of using “masculine” and “feminine.” Using “orange” or some other neutral label, to describe formerly “feminine” traits, abilities, characteristics etc. and “apple” or some other neutral label, to describe formerly “masculine” traits, abilities, characteristics, etc.

In addition we can begin using male and female instead of “man” and “woman” and young male and young female instead of boy and girl, unless boy and girl can be somehow be turned into non-gendered labels. Shehe, all one word, could mean either or both a male or a female. Young shehe could refer to a male or female child. Various labels are popping up nowadays, so this is my contribution.

With no gender connection to a person’s natural traits and attributes, there will be absolutely no excuse for anyone to ever abuse, harass or kill someone for having or expressing “orange” or “apple” characteristics, traits, gifts, abilities, etc. No cultural norm, for males and females will exist, to be “honored.” Anyone’s talents, characteristics and skills would be respected regardless of what sex/gender they were. This would eliminate the cultural violence problem altogether.

Over a span of a few centuries, the old cultural norm erroneous definitions of “masculine” and “feminine” will have died out forever, replaced by more neutral ones and “men” and “women” will die out by using more accurate male and female. With the labels gone or neutralized, people will finally be free to express themselves fully as they were naturally born to be, plusfeel respected in the process. Everyone can then be culturally gender neutral, with no characteristics, talents, skills, gifts or traits culturally designated by birth genitalia.

With that accomplished there will be liberation for many millions who now have to hide and restrict our natural selves for fear of societal retribution for having the “wrong” characteristics, talents, attributes, traits, abilities or gifts for the body sex. It brings tears to my eyes at only the thought of being able to live with a cultural freedom to express my natural talents, skills and abilities I was born with, freely and openly without being humiliated, condescended to, or made fun of for doing so.

Freedom to be me…wow what a concept! I will probably not live long enough to experience this freedom, but I know other younger “misfits” might. However, it could take another couple of centuries for society to evolve and mature enough for all to experience the freedom to be who they are, without retribution. Humans are after all, the youngest life forms on the earth, evolving after plants and animals. We could learn a lot from these predecessors, if we matured a bit more.

Surgeons, who are now making millions on surgeries to change the physical body to match the erroneous sexist labels, will lose out, of course. By eliminating the sexist labels and developing and using neutral ones, much pain and suffering will be eliminated. In addition, the suffering from hormones and undergoing surgery would also be eliminated. The biggest plus will be in the guarantee of the right to be your natural born self in public, without fear of the threat of abuse, ridicule or death. You and your body are not flawed and defective. Only society is.

Two steps to end Violence

by Kaiven Fenton MS

I think we, as a society, are tragically unaware of the potential danger of unexpressed emotional pain in our children. That pain doesn’t just dissipate on its own. A few fortunate children have the opportunity to express theirs to emotionally healthy adults who can address it or teach them how to handle it appropriately. But where does the suppressed emotional pain of the unlucky children go? For far too many kids, that pain becomes a justifiable anger or rage and left unexpressed, escalates to fury and rage, resulting in violent actions, either against themselves, others, or both.

Millions of children are desperate to feel heard and respected by someone they trust. They need to be able to verbally share, in a healthy manner, their ongoing painful feelings of being bullied, abused or neglected by siblings, parents or classmates, all during their growing up years. By sharing them, they get released and if heard by trained caring adults that can teach and guide them, the do not stay inside to fester. Adults are encouraged to share their emotions and feelings at anonymous meetings and many other community groups. Why are we denying our children this same basic well known need? We know that sharing deep feelings and being heard is essential for healthy emotional well being. For boys it will help to reverse the current and unhealthy, “suck it up” and “stuff your feelings” messages now in place. The old false beliefs that I grew up under, “Children should be seen and not heard, “(as if children did not feel deep sadness, frustration and anger,) has caused enough psychological damage.

Simple frustrations if kept within, build up to anger in the early stages. Then this inside anger, builds and piles upon itself, getting stronger and stronger, ultimately turning into rage and fury. If these emotions are not acknowledged and allowed release in a healthy manner, they will be released somehow…and in ways society does not approve of. At some point, those pent up emotions will be propelled with great force, often uncontrollably, either outwardly or inwardly.

Outwardly they are seen in the form of classroom disruption, bullying, animal killing, torture, rape, domestic violence or outright killings in schools. Expressed inwardly they are seen in the form of addictions, suicide, cutting, eating disorders, depression and anxiety. Those emotions must be released early on. It is natural to want to express feelings and emotions. However, most children do not know how to release them in a healthy way, at the frustration or anger level. So they end up holding them all in where they continually eat at them internally, until they cannot be contained anymore and they just explode with fury.

It is very natural for humans of any age, to want to express feelings and emotions. Most adults know this. This is why twelve step programs exist for adults and teens. We also promote therapy groups for adults needing to express their pain and anguish or just frustrations they experience daily or occasionally.

Nowadays, anyone can see the results of unhealthy expressions of some young person’s unspent rage and fury everywhere. However, most of society is extremely uncomfortable with even acknowledging these deep “negative” emotions. It has not been able to admit that there is a dire need for a healthy expression of them, before they build to rage and explode in fury. It is easier and more acceptable to focus on weapons, drugs, illegal immigration or almost anything else, as the cause of violence in our society. This is sad for me to recognize. I am writing to hopefully shine some light on this “elephant in society’s room.” I think we can work on providing emotional outlets for young children the same as we do for adults, knowing it is a natural and normal need.

Millions of Americans do not have time for themselves, let alone for all of their children’s emotional needs. The average parents are unlikely to address “hostile or negative” emotions in themselves, so it is unlikely they will acknowledge them in their children. Parents themselves often do not know of healthy ways to express their own emotions, let alone show their children. In addition, one or both parents are often working, usually out of economic necessity and coming home exhausted with still more household chores to do. With several children in a family, inner life is forced to take a back seat in the whirlwind of family life. Therefore we, as a society, ought not to continue to depend on, or expect parents to tend to the angry and frustrating emotions of their little ones, in a healthy manner.

The late Marshall Rosenberg devoted many years to traveling around the world and in corporate America, teaching people how to listen empathically, because, to be heard is a basic human need. Alice Miller, a famous psychologist said that even a badly abused child can turn out to be a happy, productive citizen if they have that one person in their life who can listen to them and make them feel heard and respected. You have probably heard of instances where that one special person in a child’s life (a teacher, big brother or sister, mentor or counselor) made a big difference in their life. If you ask the child what caused them to change for the better, they will tell you they felt listened to and that made all the difference.

In our ever increasing stressful society, every child deserves the right to educational and healthy emotional development. We have a powerful opportunity, to relieve our children of the extreme stress of carrying their emotional burdens alone. As I stated earlier, in this fast paced often perceived hectic society, we can no longer rely on one or two parents alone to relieve their children’s painful emotional burdens. They need our help because of the tremendous responsibilities they have. It takes a village to raise emotionally healthy children and we don’t live in tribal villages any more with help from the elders and friends. Nowadays, extended families, that used to live nearby, have mostly disappeared.

We as a society, can choose to either respect a child’s right to be heard or we can continue as we are, not listening and suffer the results. We can allow them to verbally share their personal anguish now, or we can experience physical violence from them later on, it is our societal choice. It takes a special adult that can allow a child to feel heard. I believe it is a worthwhile goal to give all of our children the skills for healthy emotional development along with their educational development. What better place for this to happen, then in our public schools and daycare centers where children gather every day, year after year?

I feel certain that, if we have the will, we can provide well trained volunteer “mentors and listeners” for every toddler and child, in every day care center, pre-school and grade school across America. Trained volunteers do not have to fix a child’s problems or even stop abuse in their life, they can refer them to other programs specifically designed to address each child and their parent’s unique situation. Volunteer listener trainees can be almost any willing person, from college and high school students to older and retired people, after receiving special training and very thorough background checks. If our “future adults” are respected, heard and loved as children, they can begin to break the violence cycle, for themselves as well as their own potential children, for generations perhaps. A more nurturing, respecting and peaceful society can then flourish.

The first step I believe, is to (1) convince society that toddlers, as well as young children, are desperate for and deserve an opportunity to be lovingly and respectfully heard. (2) implement a plan that will require every grade school and day care center across the United States to provide well trained volunteer listeners and mentors from the community; people that can maintain trusting relationships from pre-school, through grade school, as much as possible. With continued opportunities for emotional respect and support, there will be much less internal fertile ground for rage and fury to develop. It is being patiently heard that is most significant to that child. That alone could, in some cases, prevent the frequent and dangerous daily buildup of painful emotions.

Along with listener mentors, we also need to redesign our schools by “marrying” the educators with the social workers and psychologists, together under one roof. The current school counselors can then be mostly responsible for training and managing the listener mentors. Providing space, close to, or within schools, will allow social workers and psychologists to focus full time on the overall prevention of violence. Working in this preventative manner should prove much less stressful for them. It should replace their being overburdened with maximum caseloads of families and yanking children out of homes and away from parents who simply did not know how to listen to them. That way the emotional needs of students are being tended to by most the qualified professionals, leaving teachers free to teach.

Will we continue as we are, blaming everything else for the daily societal violence we witness? Or are we ready enough yet, to grow into a healthy and peaceful society? A society where children can grow up feeling respected, loved and heard, with caring and supportive help from the community is what is needed. It takes an educated, healthy “supportive village” to raise our children, if we want to end violence for good. We cannot leave that huge job to one or two parents. Our only two challenges are, to rearrange our country’s priorities and begin to put a simple listening solution into practice.

Eventually the unprecedented amount of federal, state and local monies that are now being spent for a criminal justice system that simply doesn’t work, can be redirected towards covering the cost of an education system that also includes much needed emotional development. Truly no child shall be left behind. Our society cannot feel peaceful until our kids grow up feeling peaceful, since our society only consists of grown up kids.

My reasons for Blogging….

I don’t know how to make a web page and this is the next best thing. I am a writer and I’d like a place to share my writing and get much loved responses and suggestions, or just comments on what you thought about an article or poem. I wrote in journals for many years, now I am writing on a Blog the the next many years.

Most of what you find here are poems, articles and other writings about my life mostly. How I came to be peaceful and joyful in later years from being miserable and depressed in earlier years, with Nature as my Guide.

I wrote many poems during my long life, from my first one at age 17 to the latest at age 80. A certain emotional and spiritual growth can be seen in them from out of my misery and into my joy.

It is hoped also that some of my writings may be inspiring to some and give ideas for self growth to others.

In addition I will share parts of my memoirs that I am now working on for publication. Feedback would be very helpful for anyone willing.